I used to love walking our boys down to the
end of our block to a mammoth, metal, spider-jungle-gym, a lethal merry-go-round,
six swings of different heights, four wooden benches, and a large field. Bug
Park... The delight of two boys and a lonely
mom.When we first moved into our home, I had no idea how God would use that park to ... change me. Yes, it provided hours, days, weeks, and years of fun, scrapes, brother-fights, baseball practice, grass stains, and frisbee throwing for the boys.
But me?
What it held for me was an interesting, sometimes ugly, sometimes
revelatory journey into ‘finding myself’.
When we moved here, we’d lived in three
states in three years and I was hungry for friendship. So you can imagine my delight when I found
other moms unloading their mini-vans at Bug Park. I became the unofficial self-appointed park greeter. OK, I'm very a little embarrassed to admit this; I’d
approach each mom and graciously welcome her to my the park. {Sheesh, Mary!}
I found so many other lonely moms yearning
for just a few minutes of adult-speak. Of course, our conversations were primarily
about our kids! Most of the time those were fun
conversations, but sometimes... not. The
‘not’ times were when insecurity would rear its ugly, green head.
{I hated that feeling!}
It’s funny how God can use a
park full of women
to shine a beacon of light on a boatload of insecurity.
I honestly didn’t realize I had this particular brand of insecurity until a group of moms began to talk as if being a mama was
an ‘interim’ kind of thing. The “I’m
really a CEO, and I’m just taking a year off before I get back to my ‘real’
job. And, what do you do?” mom. And the “Thank
God I get to go back to the office in two more weeks. And what did you say you do for a living?”
mom.
That's when self-doubt would flood me with feelings of 'not-good-enough'. Instead of being secure and fine with where God had me, {an at-home-Bug-Park-mom} I’d find myself saying something like, “My degree was in criminal law, but I’m just waiting a little while before going back to work.” {Knowing full-well that I’d planned to be home for more than ‘just a little while'.}
Yep, I felt like I needed to tell them that
this was my temporary job and ‘my Prada was at home’. In other words, I was embarrassed by what God
had called me to, and felt I needed to dress it up to be something ‘better’. {Like a Prada!}
I began to dread our trips to the park and
would be relieved when our play-dates were rained out.
I found that I didn’t like the Prada me at all! And that’s when I realized that our Abba
Father was revealing a wonderful truth...
Nothing trumps what
He’s called us to.
If you know He's told
you to do something...
Graciously live it-
to bring glory to His name!
"Trust in the LORD, with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He will make your paths straight."
Proverbs 3:5-6
I’d like to say this LOUD AND CLEAR ...
If:
He’s called you to be a teacher/mom... Awesome!
He’s called you to be a doctor/mom...
Wonderful!
He's called you to not be a mom... Great!
He's called you to not be a mom... Great!
He’s called you to be a cashier/mom...
Fabulous!
He’s called you to be a Bug-Park mom... Tremendous!
He's called you to be a blogging/mom... Super!
He's called you to be a blogging/mom... Super!
He’s given you a vision for an awesome
ministry
that hasn’t yet taken shape... Amazing!
that hasn’t yet taken shape... Amazing!
He’s placed it upon your heart to write a
book... Excellent!
He’s provided you with a position at WalMart...
Terrific!
He's called you to be a single woman... Marvelous!
Just be sure to seek His will for your life!
And then live it with excellence for His glory!
Just be sure to seek His will for your life!
And then live it with excellence for His glory!
There’s absolutely no shame in where God has you...
As long as you’re in the wonderful circle of His will.
There’s no embarrassment there!
You don’t have to try to be a Prada if you’re
a canvas bag.
I encourage you to pray about where God
wants you and what He wants of you...
And then, be content and allow Him
to work His character in you...
For His glory.
"But if any of you lacks wisdom, let Him ask of God, who gives
to all men generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him.
James 1:5
"May the God of peace... equip you with everything good for doing His will,
and may He work in us what is pleasing to Him, through Jesus Christ,
to whom be glory for ever and ever. Amen."
Hebrews 13:20-21
Have you ever tried to 'dress up' who you are or what God has you doing?
Have you ever felt 'less than' or embarrassed about your looks,
your spouse, your kids, your car, your home, your job, your life?
How did you get past it?
Are you in the middle of it now?
I'd love to hear your thoughts!
I must confess...
If someone gave me a Prada bag,
I'd graciously where it with a smile! :)
{OK, I'd wear it for a little while and then
I'd sell it... after I wore it for just a little while!} :)
{OK, I'd wear it for a little while and then
I'd sell it... after I wore it for just a little while!} :)
Living in His grace,
1. Please go to the block of Google Friends over in the right column and click Join this Site. This doesn't subscribe you or obligate you to anything. It's just a way to let me know that you visited Woman to Woman. If you're reading this by email, you'll need to click Here to sign in.
Each
woman who stops by(I'm talking about you!) is so precious to our
Lord and to me.
I can't tell you how much I appreciate your comments, emails, and FB messages.
It's always so good to hear from you!
I can't tell you how much I appreciate your comments, emails, and FB messages.
It's always so good to hear from you!
I enjoyed reading this post!
ReplyDeleteThanks Angela! I'm glad you came by!
DeleteBlessings to you ~ Mary
I didn't read this shit, but time to score some insecure pussy
DeleteI didn't read this shit, but time to score some insecure pussy
DeleteSo true. I'm not even a mom but I often feel insecure because I have a job well under my education and the smallest income possible....but we somehow have enough to get by and it should be enough.
ReplyDeleteBekah, it's easy to allow our insecurities to rob us of confidence and contentment. It's so important to be secure in God's will for our lives. It's difficult when we're under-employed for our education... But, like you, I'm thankful that He's provided a job for you and He's meeting your needs. He's so good!
DeleteThank you for coming by and sharing.
Blessings to you ~ Mary
I am a mom by adoption, twin adult disabled sons, now 21. Many women have, innocently, asked, "Don't you wish you would have had children of your own?" All I say is, "I do have children of my own, birthed from my heart." It used to put me on the defensive, as if I as imperfect because I was unable to conceive. I know look at my sons, not as ones who filled a void, but that my infertility was the only way I could have become their mother! And what a blessing and ride I would have missed without them! ~ Grace
ReplyDeleteOh Grace, I'm so thankful that our Abba Father knew just who these two guys needed as their mama. And yes, they ARE your children, planned from the beginning to grace your life with challenge, purpose and love. He's knows best!
DeleteI appreciate you, Grace!
Blessings and love ~ Mary
I love this. So honest! I love that we can do what God has called us to do and not be ashamed of that. I am so grateful to be that Bug-park/blogging mom! :) Thank you for your words!
ReplyDeleteHi Theresa! Yes, when we're prayerfully walking in the center of God's will, we can bring glory to His name with contentment and assurance!
DeleteFrom one Bug Park/blogging mom to another... Have an awesome week!
Blessings to you, my friend ~ Mary
I loved, loved, loved, being a stay at home mom. But even them, I felt little strange when I was around a lot of working moms. I think our lives were just very different. Both good, Fondly,
ReplyDeleteGlendabut different.
Glenda, it's funny how everyone has their areas of insecurity. I find that most women are insecure about something-regardless of careers/life-choices. Oh, that we would allow our Lord to help us focus on Him and not on ourselves!
DeleteI'm glad you came by!
Blessings to you ~ Mary
Such a great choice about owning your choices :) Love this, Mary! I'm so blessed by your blog!
ReplyDeleteThanks Crystal! Life seems full of opportunities to make the choice to believe God for our security and contentment!
DeleteThanks so much for coming by!
Blessings and love ~ Mary
Here's what I'm taking away-being in the circle of his will is what matters. We don't need to do impression management and make everyone approve of where we are in our life! Just be obedient, be righteous, be kind, be who he called us to be-daughters of our father, disciples of our Savior. I love this post!
ReplyDeleteHelene, I'd say you nailed it! It's never about us... It's always about bringing glory to our Abba Father! Thanks for putting it so well!
DeleteBlessings to you ~ Mary
Thanks for this. Really encouraged me in the place I'm in. Been struggling with not having a job and just being a house wife. Its hard sometimes to feel like you're serving God when your day is just involving cleaning and cooking etc! Praying God would help me learn to see it as serving Him and do it wholeheartedly unto Him, even when it seems small and insignificant!
ReplyDeleteI've so been there. What we need to remember is that nothing done with an attitude towards pleasing Him is ever small or insignificant. Cleaning and cooking, when done for Him, trumps anything done to make ourselves feel better about ourselves. I'm praying right now that He would help you to find contentment, joy, and purpose right where you are...
DeleteThanks so much for coming by and sharing!
Blessings to you ~ Mary
I needed to be reminded of this, thank you.
ReplyDeleteWendy, I'm so glad it spoke to you today!
DeleteIt's good to have you here!
Blessings to you ~ Mary
I love this! It really is about living where you are called. And I like your little poem there at the bottom :) I would do the same thing, wear it for a bit and then sell it. Hey, I would always have bragging rights and a photo, or 2 or 3 ;)
ReplyDeleteKendra, you're so right. It's about living and being content in the arms of His will.
DeleteOh yes, I'd have to get a few pics of me with the bag before I sold it! :)
What a freeing post!
ReplyDeleteSusanne, God's word is so freeing, isn't it?! There's such freedom in being who He's called us to be... His!
DeleteThanks for visiting!
Blessings to you ~ Mary
Having feelings of insecurity is satan's way of lying to us. Satan whispers these lies in our ears all of the time. However, when he does this, we must affirm who we are in Christ by boldly declaring all of the affirmations that you so beautifully wrote about (wonderful, terrific, tremendous, awesome, great, etc.)
ReplyDeletePsalm 139:14 reminds us that," for I am fearfully and wonderfully made ."
Have a beautiful day!
Amen Trinity! Every time we recognize a lie, we need to affirm who we are in Christ! Yes, we ARE fearfully and wonderfully made!
DeleteThanks for coming by!
Blessings to you ~ Mary
This was an awesome read! Often there seems to be so much judgement on both sides of the stay-at-home and working mom debate. Both make choices that are best for themselves, their children and their families and should be applauded for the sacrifices and work that they do. This was a very refreshing read and I love the insight you provided on your internal struggle with your decision. Visiting from Doing You Well Wednesday :)
ReplyDeleteHi Michelle! You're so right. Both work-at-home and out-of-home moms sacrifice so much for their families. We can be content where ever God has us as long as we're in His will. Thanks so much for coming by!
DeleteBlessings to you ~ Mary
I truly loved this post! I am a mom and have been for 40 years. My youngest just graduated from high school. It just seems so strange to think about having no more children at home. I believe God called me to be a mom and I have totally enjoyed all of it. I am not sure where I go from here, but I'm sure there is a plan for me. I worked some during those 40 years, and actually had a great job, but my first calling was always my family.
ReplyDeleteVisiting from DYWW.
http://agutandabutt.blogspot.com/2013/05/blog-every-day-in-may-vivid-memories.html
Betty, you're certainly entering into a new season of life... but you'll always be a mom! I too am an empty-nester. It felt really strange/devastating at first because I loved having a house full. But it's amazing how God can help us adjust and embrace this new season. {Actually, I now get to wear my jammies, without a robe, around the house because my sons aren't home anymore... Nice!} So it does have it's upsides!
DeleteBlessings to you ~ Mary
I loved your fun story about YOUR park and all the ladies finding companionship. We all get lonely at times, even in a crowd. We want to be noticed and accepted.
ReplyDeleteWhat a lovely place for peace and comfort - the park.
Hazel, you're so right. Our biggest challenge is to be where and who God has called us to be. God was so good to use a park and some precious women to teach me a boatload of lessons!
DeleteThank yo for coming by!
Blessings to you ~ Mary
Love this post! I did this(pretending)for a while and decided I was right where God wanted me to be. Found you over at Doing Well Wednesday! Blessings!
ReplyDeleteThanks Cynthia! Is give us such freedom when we realize we're right where God wants us!
DeleteI'm so glad you came over!
Blessings to you ~ Mary
So true: "Nothing trumps what He calls us to do."
ReplyDeleteYour post brought me back... (I'm a mom to grown kids too.) It's funny how following what God called you to do (eventually) provides a security of self which is unshakable.
Great article - and I love the list of callings at the end and how you affirm each one. Sometimes we just need to hear/see it...
Yes Lori, to be secure in who we are in Christ, changes our relationship with Him and with everyone else! I love the word 'unshakeable'!
DeleteThanks so much for taking the time to read and comment!
Blessings to you ~ Mary
Great encouragement to embrace where we are in life. I needed to hear this today. Thanks!
ReplyDeleteHolly, I'm glad it spoke to you! Yes, we need to make sure we're where God wants us... And then embrace it and grow in it!
DeleteBlessings to you, my friend ~ Mary
Thank you so much for your post. It brought tears to my eyes that I didn't expect, I think because I can so relate! I am a new stay-at-home mama and am honored God has called me to this big job, but insecurities can creep up so quickly! Thank you for your honesty and great reminders about living to glorify God in all that we do. That is the kind of example I want to be to my kids!
ReplyDeleteSummer, it seems that both, women who work in and out of home, can have a boatload of insecurities. And you're right, they can creep up so quickly! That's why it's so important to recognize who we are in Christ and where He wants us... and then ask Him to grow and shape us into women who love Him beyond anything else! It sounds as though you're a great example to your little ones! Enjoy your precious time with them!
DeleteBlessings to you, my friend ~ Mary
I think there are an awful lot of "at-home-Bug-Park" moms out there, Mary. I just think they're too afraid to admit it. I know I've faced this kind of situation in the past. And in some ways I still struggle with where God has me. But I'm learning, like you have and are, to find contentment in who God created me to be and just where He's got me. Thanks for this inspiring and thought-provoking post. I'm so glad you linked it up at Wedded Wed too, my friend!
ReplyDeleteBeth, it seems we'll always be changing, learning, and growing to be women after His heart... wanting to bring glory to His name. He's so good to secure our identity in Him! Thanks so much for hosting Wedded Wed.!
DeleteBlessings to you, my friend ~ Mary
Mary - this is absolutely incredible. A lovely piece, I just love it. I have chosen to highlight it in my first monthly newsletter coming out July 1. :) So excited to share this with my readers!
ReplyDeleteApril, I'm honored that I'll be included in your newsletter! Congratulations on your blog's great new look and wonderful content! Kingdom Excellence!
DeleteBlessings and love, my friend ~ Mary
This is excellent!
ReplyDeleteThank you! It's so good to have you here!
DeleteBlessings to you ~ Mary
Oh wow, I love this. I am the queen of comparison and have been doing a lot of it lately. I find myself comparing myself to younger moms and wishing I could go back and do it differently. I want to be content just where God has me.
ReplyDeleteOh Barbie, I hear you! Moms today have so many great resources and renewed intentionality... I've found myself wishing I could go back {with what I know now} and do things differently. BUT, I then take control over those thoughts and remember that our God is the great Redeemer. And like you, I want to be content and glorify God where He has me!
DeleteI'm so glad you came by!
Blessings to you ~ Mary
Love, love, love that quote: We don't exist to feel good about ourselves. We exist to bring glory to God!
ReplyDeleteThanks Gail! It's something I have to remind myself of! :)
DeleteBringing glory to His name is the very reason we exist!
Thank you for coming by!
Blessings to you ~ Mary
Dear Mary
ReplyDeleteI am writing as one Prada to another! The world has played havoc with the minds of stay-at-home moms. Whenever I was attacked by the evil one whispering these lies in my ears, it helped me a lot to remind myself hat Jesus' mom was also only just a housewife and that was good enough for Him. So, one day, dear friend, you are going to be a great Bug Park grandmother.
Much love XX
Mia
Oh Mia, I love the thought that Jesus had an at-home-mom! Yep, that makes me smile!
DeleteI have a sweet 8 month old granddaughter that lives across the country from us. I'm going out to see her in August and I'll definitely take her to a park!! :)
I hope you're having a good week!
Much to to you ~ Mary
Oh man. I've been there! I am a registered nurse, but currently a stay at home mom. When people ask what I do, I say "well, I'm a nurse but I'm currently a stay at home mom, which happens to be the best job ever." That way I present that I attended college (why do I feel like they need to know that? Insecurity much?) But at the same time, I really do love being a stay at home mom. I sometimes feel bad for not working though because I worked so hard for my degree, but I feel like I need to be at home right now. I'm torn! Thanks for the sweet reminder that God has me right where He wants me at this moment! :)
ReplyDeleteStephanie, isn't it amazing the struggles-with-our-thoughts we have? Congratulations on being a registered nurse... that represents A LOT of hard work! AND congratulations on currently being an at-home mom with your little ones... THAT requires A LOT of work too! Rejoice and rest in where God has you and glorify Him in all you do!
DeleteBlessings to you ~ Mary
I relate to this as well. We have been conditioned to think that motherhood is a less than noble position - that there is something more fulfilling...that filling in that blank to the "What do you do" question requires something more prestigious. What can be more prestigious than raising up little tykes who will one day be their generation's decision makers? And why would we want to leave that job to people who do not share our values?
ReplyDeleteRosilind, you've said this so well! The most important thing is to seek GOD as to where HE wants us {whether in or out of the home} and then rest and rejoice right there... bringing glory to Him!
Deletethanks so much for coming by!
Blessings to you ~ Mary
You really seem to have struck a chord here, Mary. How wonderful that now you can be a cheerleader for women in the blog world...you've moved from the park!
ReplyDeleteI see insecurity in many ways with us women. It's like we don't know what to say that will cover it all...or make it sound good too. You know, if it's good enough for God to give, it's good enough!
Great post.
Peace in Christ,
Ceil
Hi Ceil! You're so right... We women have so many insecurities and none are God-glorifying. Our security comes from Him p.e.r.i.o.d!
DeleteI'm so glad you came by!
Blessings to you ~ Mary
Mary, thank you for this blog!! I'm not a mom, nor a wife, I'm a woman who is just finishing her bachelor's who had always said she wanted to be an attorney. But the thing is, my boyfriend and I are already planning our wedding and we know we want kids soon after (I'm 28, not getting any younger). Since we've been discussing this, I realized I wanted to be a stay at home mom, I even want to home school. And I've felt like I'm in a rut b/c everyone expects me to do something grand (work wise) and all I can feel would be grand would be being there for my family. I want to work for now in a job that serves others & eventually say goodbye to that job & hello to motherhood, and I feel ashamed of that.
ReplyDeleteBut this blog helped me see that I'm not alone and that if God wills me to work & be a mom, work & not be a mom, or to be a park going mom, I will NOT be ashamed b/c it's His will! Thank you, thank you, thank you!
I'm so glad you came by. Like you, it's certainly an issue that I struggled with. Living to fulfill the expectations of others (and our own) can be so confusing. I'm glad you're thinking about this before you get married. Perhaps you and your fiance can talk and pray about this together. As long as you're walking in God's will for you and your family... There is no shame!
DeleteBlessings to you ~ Mary
I loved reading this. I was a stay at home mom for over 20 years and loved it and saw its worth but felt like I had to defend myself and staying home from time to time. My insecurities have come about from comments my husband has made over the past 30 years about me and not from others who were working outside the home.
ReplyDeleteLeisa, It seems that both stay-at-home moms and outer-working moms struggle with these insecurities. I pray that we can recognize our worth comes from our Creator. Apart from Him we are worthless, but with Him, we are daughters of the King! That's such an awesome identity!
DeleteThank you for coming by!
Blessings to you, my friend ~ Mary