A blog where women are inspired and encouraged to grow in their relationship with Christ.

Monday, May 20, 2013

How Can I Make Him Love Me?



Hand and flowerThere once was a quiet little girl who had a very unhappy mommy.  Even though the mommy was very unhappy and angry, this quiet little girl loved her very much and for years would lie in bed at night trying to think of ways to make her mommy love her.

She would make her mommy’s bed every morning.
She would clean the whole house.
She would be very quiet when her mommy was napping.
She would try very hard not to say stupid stuff.
She would try very hard not to cry.

As that quiet little girl, I would work so hard to be  
‘good enough'; hoping that my mom would love me. 

Many years have passed, and I’m now a grown woman with grown children of my own.  I came to know my loving and merciful Savior decades ago.  I’ve had countless moments with my Lord where I’ve been overwhelmed 
by the revelation and reality of His love for me.   
But none can compare with one Sunday morning
sitting in church, when I heard this...   

For the LORD your God is living among you.
He is a mighty savior.
He will take delight in you with gladness.
With His love, He will calm all your fears.
He will rejoice over you with joyful songs. 
Zephaniah 3:17 NLT

After the service, I cornered the pastor and tearfully asked him to explain this verse again.  I remember asking him, “But what do I have to do to get Him to delight in me?”  He quietly said that simply because I’m His daughter and I love Him, He delights in me.  I pretended that I understood, thanked him, and walked away.

Lessons learned young can be very difficult to ‘unlearn’.  It’s taken me many years to believe that my Abba Father delights in me and rejoices over me with singing.  I occasionally still struggle with “If I do this, will He love me more?” 

The whole ‘grace thing’ has been difficult for me.  Surely, I must do something good to make Him love me.  
 And then I look at this picture.

This is a picture of our son and the most adorable grand-baby ever.  I see the look of absolute love and delight on his face as he looks into the eyes of our Emma.  And I see the look of absolute adoration on the face of Emma looking into the eyes of her daddy.  He’s holding her in the palm of his hand.  She’s not doing anything special to make him love her.  She’s just being Emma, his daughter, his delight. 

And I recognize the delight of my own Abba Father…
And it makes me love Him even more.  
Actually, I think that was the plan all along.

I just thought you might need a 
reminder today that 
our Abba Father delights in you and is singing 
a song over you because He loves you… 
Oh, and doesn’t that just make you love Him more?!

Before I leave, I must tell you that some time ago my precious mom also became a daughter of the King.  She’s become such a loving part of my life and the best 
grandma my children could possibly have.  Isn’t it cool 
that He’s delighting in and singing over both of us?  
I love that! 
Do you ever think about God delighting in and singing over you?
Do you sometimes feel that you need to do something to make Him love you more? 
Or perhaps you easily accept His grace-filled love and delight.
I'd love to hear your thoughts.
Leave a comment!

There are parts of this song that really spoke to me.
Enjoy!

Living in His grace,
  Mary  
Picture 1
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51 comments:

  1. Oh, my! What a beautiful, beautiful post! Tears fill my eyes as I write this. The picture of your son holding his daughter really does give us the perfect picture of how the Lord sees us. Thank you for a beautiful reminder of this. Such a blessing!

    God bless you - Julie

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    1. Julie, I'm just in awe that God would delight in and sing songs over us... And we don't even have to work for it! That still blows me away! I love this picture too. It's such a beautiful father-daughter moment.
      Thank you for stopping by and sharing a comment!
      Blessings to you ~ Mary

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  2. This was such a sweet and touching post. I love the picture of your son and your granddaughter because it so acurately captures a father's love. I think we struggle with this concept because the world paints the picture that in order to be loved, you must first "do something," like a give and take sort of deal. But God is not like that; He loves unconditionally and that has always been mind-blowing for me.Thank you for sharing this.

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    1. Thank you Stacie! Looking at this picture, I get such a sense of our Abba's love. You're so right, the world does say you must first 'do something' and then... It's just such a God thing to be loved without works. His grace is amazing!
      I'm so glad you came by!
      Blessings to you ~ Mary

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  3. Thank you so much for this post - I really need this today. I pray that God will continue to inspire you to write from your heart.

    Especially thankful - Trinity

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    1. Trinity, I'm so glad to hear that God gave you just what you needed! Thank you for praying... It means so much. I'm so grateful.
      It's so good to have you here!
      Blessings and love ~ Mary

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  4. Mary - it may just be that I'm having a rough day and already highly emotional, but this post had me in tears. I know what you mean about trying to get your mom to love you. My mom is not the most maternal ;) I am thankful, though, that Christ called me once I was an adult, and from the very beginning I have known His grace and accepted that there is nothing I can do to earn His love. :) It's been an integral part of my walk, and I pray that everyone will know and feel how amazing his grace is... for we are saved by His grace alone, and not of our works so that no one may boast. :) Thank you, Mary!

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    1. Oh April, aren't we beyond blessed to know the absolute love and delight of our Father?! I'm so grateful that you have such a complete assurance of His grace and not-by-works love. I'm sorry to hear that you had a rough day... I'm praying right now for a restorative night's sleep... emotional and physical rest.:)
      Blessings and love to you, my friend ~ Mary

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  5. I love this! In my Bible Study we were recently discussing that God loves AND admires us. I grew up hearing HE loves me in Sunday school forever and ever...I accept it...kinda. But the admiration? How can that be possible? But it is truth. Thanks for the reminder.

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    1. Bekah, I love how God continually reveals more of Himself to us! Hearing that He admires, delights in, and rejoices over us with singing makes my heart swell with love for Him.
      Thanks so much for sharing!
      Blessing to you ~ Mary

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  6. Thank you, Mary. At almost 50, I still seek my mother's love and approval, Most of my life, I felt as if I did not belong. But in Christ, I found acceptance and love, just as I am. Thank you for this reminder.

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    1. Grace, I'm so thankful that even though we humans are so flawed, there is One who loves and accepts and embraces with perfection. He delights in us... Wow!
      I appreciate you, Grace!
      Blessings and love ~ Mary

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  7. This is absolutely beautiful. It's hard for me to think of God delighting me in. I believe the scriptures to be true, but all my Christian life I've struggled to accept this truth for myself. I am so thankful that your mom knows the Lord and that you have a wonderful relationship. What a precious photo of your son and granddaughter!

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    1. Barbie, as hard as it is to accept and understand, I'm so grateful that our Abba delights in us. Because it's beyond my comprehension, I simply have to trust that His word is true. I appreciate that you came by and shared a comment!
      Blessings to you ~ Mary

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  8. The picture of your son and his sweet girl capture it perfectly. Makes me want to crawl up in my Heavenly Father's lap!

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    1. Alicia, I feel the same way! The very thought of nestling into His arms and looking into His eyes... I can't comprehend the depth of love we'll see!
      Thanks so much for dropping by!
      Blessings to you ~ Mary

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  9. Oh...that even when the word doesn't find favor, joy, delight in us...God does! How many of us need to hear that today! May we live for an audience of one! Redeeming! Thank you! ~ Jen

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    1. Oh Jen, I love that! 'Live for an audience of One'... beautiful!
      Thanks so much for visiting!
      Blessings to you ~ Mary

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  10. Dear sweet Mary
    Oh, my friend, I nearly cried as I was reading this!! My mother passed away when I was three years old and my dad remarried my mother's cousin when I was four. I have two brothers and a sister from the second marriage and I love them very much. The one thing I battled for a long time in my life, was for my mother to love me just as much as she loved them. We all pretended that it was the case, but it was not and probably will never be. A few years ago my husband told me that she is not able to love me the way I wanted her too! Today I can honestly say that I have made peace with that, but I also don't allow her to manipulate me anymore! I love my mom very much, but would rather prefer the little she is able to give from an honest heart, than pretending something that just is not true.
    Thank you for sharing your heart! It makes me wonder if this does not have something to do with the Fibro?
    Blessings and love
    Mia

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    1. Oh Mia, my heart aches that you lost your mom so young. It must have been very hard growing up always feeling 'not quite as loved' as your brothers and sister. It seems that, regardless of our age... we have a deep longing for a mother's love. Family relationships can certainly be complicated. I'm beyond grateful for our Abba Father's immeasurable love and delight. The reality of that, makes the lacking of our of-this-world-relationships dim in importance.
      As for the Fibro connection- I've thoroughly explored the possibility and believe there's definitely a relationship. Thank you so much for mentioning it.:)
      Much love to you my friend ~ Mary

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  11. Mary, tears. I know exactly what you mean. Thank you for writing this.

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    1. Ashley, I'm in awe that we have a loving Father that heals our hurts and delights in and sings over us! We are blessed.
      I'm so glad you came by... I was just thinking about you!
      Blessings and love ~ Mary

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  12. Thank you for the picture. It made the scripture come alive!

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    1. Helene, that's exactly how I felt. A Father's delight... priceless!
      I'm glad you came by!
      Blessings to you ~ Mary

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  13. So thankful for God's love for me.

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    1. Oh Debbie, I am too! He's so good to us!
      Thanks for stopping by!
      Blessings to you ~ Mary

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  14. Hi Mary, wow, such a heart-felt post. Its amazing how we get God's love for us so twisted up by the examples set for us. Its hard to swallow that He loves us, just because. So glad that not only did you discover that, your mom did too and your relationship with her is healing.
    God bless
    Tracy

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    1. Tracy, we can make a mess of accepting God's love, can't we? He gives it so lavishly and then calls us to extend it lavishly. His love is so healing...
      Thanks for your comment!
      Blessings to you ~ Mary

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  15. Beautiful post and wonderful ending Mary-such praise! There is something special about everyone, and God specially created us and is very proud of who we are. As long as we are sincere, loyal, and faithful, and offer our heart and soul to Him, He chooses us. :)

    Blessings and hugs,
    Denise

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    1. Denise, God has such a beautiful way of healing relationships... I'm so thankful! His love and delight is so full of grace. Knowing that He delights in me, truly makes me love Him even more!
      I'm glad you visited!
      Blessings and love ~ Mary

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  16. I'm glad that you are continuing to develop your relationship with the Savior. It is definitely our most important one, that's for sure. Thank you for being willing to share things that are obviously so personal to you in order to help strengthen others' faith.

    Also, I'm happy to be your newest follower! I'd love it if you could take a second to check out my blog and follow me back :)

    Thanks so much,
    Tyson @ www.uplifting-love.com

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    1. Hi Tyson! Yes, our relationship with our Savior is the ultimate!
      I'm so glad you came by and thanks for following!
      I'm on my way over to your place!
      Blessings to you ~ Mary

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  17. Mary,

    That photograph is a perfect illustration of the Father's love for us. Such joy on both faces!

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    1. Jennifer, I can't wait to one day see that delight and love on my Father's face!
      This picture gives me a glimpse!
      Blessings to you ~ Mary

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  18. I love that photo, and you're right, it really does show how God looks at us. Beautiful! I also love that passage from Zephaniah. Since you shared that new Amy Grant song, I'll let you know that this was the song that played in my head during your post: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kx2FM5AsKkA

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    1. Gabby, thanks so much for sharing 'He Will Rejoice"... it's beautiful and perfect for this post!
      I appreciate you coming by!
      Blessings to you ~ Mary

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  19. I am linked up right before you over at Thrive at Home (since I already stopped by Tahila's blog) and thought I'd read this post of yours. I was so blessed!! Most of the time I don't feel like the Lord even thinks of me let alone sings over me. I don't measure up, but to 'do' things to measure up is works based and not grace-based, so I am going to allow these words to penetrate into my heart tonight. Thanks Mary, your posts are always so after God.

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    1. Judith, I'm so glad you came by! I know that our Lord takes great delight in you and sings amazing songs of love over you! {It's funny how I can believe that for you, but it's more difficult for myself! :)} BTW, I loved reading your testimony!
      Blessings and love ~ Mary

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  20. What a beautiful post! Thank you for sharing.

    (Here from Thriving Thursday)

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    1. Thanks Tracee! It's so nice having you here today!
      Blessings to you ~ Mary

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  21. It must have been hard to share that wound with all of us, but what a beautiful reminder of how GREAT our Father's love is for us. It's a perfect love, not limited by human emotions or thinking! The "grace" thing is hard for me sometimes, too, but I'm a work in progress and I know that is enough. Thank your for your words!
    P.S. I used the same verse from Zephaniah in a post I wrote recently called the Superwoman Myth. If you have a chance to read it, I think it would speak to you as much as your words spoke to me.

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    1. Hi Jen! Our Abba Father is so able to do above and beyond what we think possible! I'm so thankful for His forgiveness and love. You're right... we're definitely works in progress!:)
      I'm on my way over to read the 'Superwoman Myth'!
      Blessings to you ~ Mary

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  22. Mary, this is something that I deal with at times. I know that by just being and accepting his love, God delights in me but then something may happen that then I makes me wonder if he delights in what I'm doing, as if his love was circumstancial. But thank you for reminding us of this.

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    1. Maria, I'm so thankful that He continues to teach us by showering us with His love and delight... We have so much to learn! :)
      I'm glad you came by today!
      Blessings to you ~ Mary

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  23. Absolutely beautiful, this brought tears to my eyes. I'm learning this, very slowly, but I'm learning. Thank you for sharing today.

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    1. Thank you Rose. I'm right there learning it with you... slowly but, yes, surely.
      I'm glad you came by!
      Blessings to you ~ Mary

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  24. It amazes me how God crosses over paths of His children so we know we aren't alone in what we are/have endured. I too grew up feeling as you, and today we are going through the process of my family pretty much dismissing us because we are not living up to their "measuring stick" and have chosen God's. They proclaim to be Christians, but their fruits tell differently. It is interesting how they have attacked us from our walk to our church and thankfully, God has surrounded us with our true family and His numerous blessings. Thank you for His and your words of inspiration. I still hold faith in knowing that until our last breath there is always hope! Thank you Mary!!!

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    1. Oh Deby, my heart aches for you. For years my parents were so angry with us for our relationship with the Lord. After much prayer and grace, they came to know Him as their own and lovingly embraced us. But those years weren't easy... I'm so thankful that you have a loving church family and know our Abba Father so intimately. I'm praying right now for you and your family. Thank you for sharing your heart.
      Blessings and much love, my friend ~ Mary

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    2. thank you! God has opened my eyes to His Truth. All those years of feeling unloved because of something I had done, finally, I realize it wasn't me. Because of their committing the sin of premarital sex, I came about. He has helped me realize that I have been a constant reminder of their sin, they who live the "Better Homes and Garden" lives. No matter the cost/sacrifice of the inside - outside has to look smashing! I am so thankful and blessed (years to recognize this!) I have never "fit into" this family - I have "always been different". It is because He knew one day I would be head over heels in love with Him and prepared me to be who I am today - "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose." (Romans 8:28) So thankful for my brothers/sisters in Christ! One of whom is you!!!

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  25. Thank you, Mary for linking up with WholeHearted Home this week. Your posts are always such a blessing as I read through some of them each week.

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    1. Thank you Judith. I'm so blown away by all you accomplish! Thanks so much for your faithfulness... I so appreciate you!
      Blessing to you ~ Mary

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